3 months down, ??? to go.

BeFunky Collage

So, today is roughly the 3 month anniversary of the blog, and therefore of my decision to go grey.  As I also turned 32 last week, I thought that now might be a good time to reflect upon the things that I have learnt so far.

  • Having grey hair under the age of 40 makes you pretty unique, and is therefore something to be celebrated.  That’s part of the reason why I started this blog in the first place – I could find very few people writing for women my age about how to go through this process.  It is also really empowering to challenge society’s expectations of you and how you should look.
  • If you try to bleach hair that has been dyed 468565 times, it will go orange.  This was the first stumbling block that I hit in this process.  I had naively assumed that I could go to the hairdresser, ask them to bleach and then dye my hair grey, the roots would assimilate and that would be it.  Nope.
  • It’s a good idea to cut off as much of your hair as you can bear.  I cut about 3 inches off mine, and I am thinking about going shorter.  It shortens the time that it takes to grow out the roots, and it means that the hair that is left looks as healthy as possible.
  • It is also a good idea to think about looking after your grey hair as early in the process as possible.  Although you don’t necessarily have to do what I did, which was to get very excited and buy the most expensive shampoo on the market.  Do your research and shop around.  There is a good article by Sali Hughes about grey hair products here.
  • Related to the above point – there are frustratingly few products readily available that are specifically for grey hair.  Blonde hair, yes.  But not grey.  You can use blonde hair products on grey hair, but that is beside the point.  I was in a major branch of Boots just this morning, and could find ZERO products specifically for women with grey hair.  They are out there, but they are pretty elusive.
  • I am pretty lucky that my hair colour at the time that I decided to go grey was a kind of reddish-brown.  This has definitely made it easier to put up with the roots.  They don’t show up as much as they would against very very dark hair.
  • Many people (including me) go much greyer at the front of their hair than at the back.  I have no idea why this is.
  • I have been surprised by how unfazed I have been by my grey roots.  I actually quite like them.  I rarely wish to cover them up, and often I actively show them off.  I may change my mind further down the line, but at the moment I don’t feel that I look like I have ‘let myself go’, which seems to be a common fear when people start this process.
  • This may be a controversial statement, and I am sorry if I offend anyone.  I am glad that I decided to go grey now, rather than in 20 years’ time.  I think that for a lot of older women, the ageing process really starts to get scary and inconvenient, and growing out grey on top of that is just an extra stress.  There is more pressure to look polished as we get older, and to not ‘let the side down’.  I think that being young with grey hair will enable to me to have a bit more fun with it (e.g. pink rinses!), which I may not be so up for later in life.  Most people in my life, especially those my age, have been really supportive of my decision and seem to be quite excited by it.  For some of the older women I have spoken to, this hasn’t been the case.  This in no way applies to everyone and is just my opinion.  It is tied in to society, and sexist attitudes to greyness, which I intend to write about soon.

That’s about it.  It will be interesting to see how I feel about this in 6-12 months’ time.  Thanks for reading, as always!

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10 thoughts on “3 months down, ??? to go.

  1. Completely agree with the last point…. I’d rather do it now, in my 30s , than in two decades or so, firstly because, come on, 10 more years or MORE of dying?! hell no! And also, because I’m pretty certain that doing it at that age it will be yet another crappy thing to deal with, or even more reason for others to think I am letting myself go, or maybe I think that… Hopefully I am making sense 😉 Loved the post xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Alex. Really enjoying your blog. Just wanted to say, I am 49 and starting to grow in my grey, and I don’t feel as different from you as you might think, despite my being older. I started going grey around your age, so I’ve been covering my roots for 16 or 17 years. We’re probably at a similar stage in our ‘grey journey’, I just happen to be older. I’m not scared by the ageing process, I look pretty good for my age, and I still shop in Topshop. I don’t feel like I’ve postponed going grey for 20 years, I just happen to be going grey at this age. And I am totally up for having fun with my colour. In fact, probably like yourself, a large part of the attraction is the range of colours on the market now. I was thinking a lavender rinse. Keep up the good work! x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Carolyn. It’s really good to get your perspective. I can only go by the people I have spoken to, and not all of them have your attitude. I really admire you. Thanks so much for reading the blog and for commenting. x

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  3. I stopped dying at 40 and to avoid the accusations of ‘letting myself go’ I definitely pay more attention to make up and clothes and hair cutting and styling than before.

    I’m toying with a turquoise rinse fit my summer hols! My daughter will ge mortified but u care not!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hi! 43 and mom of three here. Been dying my hair for more than twenty years and recently decided that I’m SO DONE with it. Been four months since I last colored it and I agree with a lot of your points above. I LOVE the streaks of grey/silver/white that I have (I have a patch of it on each temple). I cut my hair chin length to get all the sad scraggly color-damaged stuff off and I often pull
    Up the sides cause I love the grey!
    Looking forward to seeing more of your blog!

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  5. I agree with all your points – nicely put! I especially like the last one – I’d been thinking along these lines but hasn’t managed to articulate it quite so well. I’m pretty happy with how I look just now (at 40) so that’s partly why I’m feeling confident enough to face up to the grey. I don’t want to add it to a list of age related insecurities which may or may not appear further down the line . Interesting that you don’t feel like you’re letting yourself go (whatever that means) . This is something I worry about – I want to look professional and like I care about how I look, and I don’t want my hair to be a distraction…I feel that I may well be overthinking all this though and overestimating how much other people might care (or not) about what my hair looks like!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I definitely think it is very easy to overthink these things. Most people don’t even take any notice of our hair, I’m sure of it. The only thing I worry about is that it makes me look unprofessional, but I haven’t had any comments so far!

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